@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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