Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
