just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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