There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
