i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
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