Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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