a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
