in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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