I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
