Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
