I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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