i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
