At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Randomize
