she looked like the before picture.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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