He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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