If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Randomize
