Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
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