How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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