Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
