i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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