on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
