if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Randomize
