ya dads aren't the best wingmen
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
