I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
