Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
