you turned your livingroom into a bong?
either way he was missing a nipple.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
