i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
