just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
