After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
