he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
