you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
