Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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