Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
