At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
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