i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
