The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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