She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
