Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
