I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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