Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
So here I am, sexting at work.
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