Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
The best revenge is premature balding
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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