Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
We just shotgunned beers for America
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
