Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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