I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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