That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Randomize
