Grow some girl-balls and come out already
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Randomize
