did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
