just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
