just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
