I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
